Episode Recap: Cook Islands, Week 3

Episode: Flirting and Frustration Original Air Date: Thursday, September 28, 2006 During the review of last week's episode, we find out what made Billy think that Kandice is in love with him. At the end of the last challenge, Billy turns to the White tribe and says, "I'm next." Feeling sorry for Billy, Kandice says, "We love you." Billy smiles and responds, "I love you." So Billy wasn't crazy, just hard-of-hearing. Day 7 - Cao Boi of the Asian tribe is still talking. He hasn't stopped since the beginning of the contest. Brad reflects, "I have had a coming to Jesus in my own mind about Cao Boi - the guy just does not shut up. I don't think he's all there ... and don't think he will ever be there, unless he's medicated." Read the rest of this article on TVChicken.com/Survivor

Episode Recap: Amazing Race 10, Week 2

Episode: Can Horses Smell Fear? Original Air Date: September 24, 2006 This week's episode starts off with the teams assigned to catch a bus and then a train to Outer Mongolia. Only five of the teams will be able to catch the first bus leaving at 12:00 am. The other teams will have to wait until 2:00 am. Pretty Boys Tyler and James (models/crackheads/jerks) are the first to leave since they won the previous challenge, and of course, are able to sign up for the midnight bus. In order to confirm what big butt pimples they are, they decide to hang around the depot and rub it in to those teams who have to ride the 2:00 am bus. I don't know what it is about being a tourist that make people feel they can give up all attempts at personal dignity when it comes to the clothes they wear (I'm talking about you, fanny-pack people). But the contestants on the Amazing Race are always willing to take it to the next level. For instance, several of the teams tonight are sporting flashlights strapped to their heads, like they're a bunch of coal miners or something.Speaking of coal miners and dressing like you don't care... Read the rest on TVChicken.com/amazing_race

Episode Recap: Cook Islands, Week 2

Episode: Dire Straights and Dead Weight Original Air Date: Thursday, September 21, 2006 This week's episode opens with the "Hiki" (Black) tribe. After four days without clean drinking water, the team is desperate to start a fire. They take turns striking their machete against their newly-acquired piece of flint over and over again until finally, after a lot of frustration, Sundra succeeds in starting a fire. I expected to see a victorious Tom-Hanks-in-Castaway kind of declaration, "I... HAVE MADE FIRE!" Instead, Sundra looks around and says, "Um guys, it's lit. What do we do now?" The team gets together and builds the fire bigger, enabling them to boil much-needed water. As they dance around the fire, part of the screen is blurred out directly behind Nate. Apparently, Nate is smiling at both ends, if you get my drift. And this guy isn't even a plumber. I would think that minimal behavior when on national television would be the ability to keep your britches up. Next, the "Aitu" (Latino) tribe. They've just speared a bunch of fish and crabs and are pretty full of themselves. "Latinos are just good workers," Ozzy says, "It's in our blood." See the full re-cap on TVChicken.com/Survivor

Releasing the Hounds, We've Got a Floater, and Your Chance to Finally Meet Hasselhoff

Who Let the Dog Out? Duane Chapman aka Dog the Bounty Hunter and two of his co-stars, who were arrested earlier for illegal detention and conspiracy, were released from jail Friday on bail. Dog was released on $300,000 bond while his co-stars were released on $100,000 each. They will be required to wear electric monitoring devices while they await their trial. I can't wait to see the episodes that show them running around trying to catch bad guys while sporting ankle bracelets. A&E will be airing a special Tuesday night entitled Dog: The Family Speaks. Speak, Dog, speak! Good Dog. Some People Will Do Anything to Be on TV A dead body washed up close to the set of CSI: Miami Friday where the crew was filming a scene for an upcoming episode. A homeless man spotted the body in Biscayne Bay at Bicentennial Park and reported it to a police officer who was moonlighting as a security guard for the show. Amazingly, this is not the first time a body has showed up near a location where a CSI was filming. One was found this week in a building in Los Angeles where CSI: New York was being filmed. America's Got Talent Tryouts Begin Do you have a special talent that ought to be shared with the world? No? Well that didn't stop several of last season's contestants from trying out for America's Got Talent. Those who have no sense of personal dignity will be interested to know that America's Got Talent is holding its first open casting call for next season on Sep 25th in Branson, Missouri. You'll need a doctor's release, among other things. More info here. Don't forget to checkout our recap of this week's Amazing Race at TVChicken.com/amazing_race.

Episode Recap: Amazing Race 10, Week 1

Episode: Real Fast! Quack! Quack! Original Air Date: September 17, 2006 Seattle, famous for the Space Needle and... some other stuff I'm sure. This city is the starting point for this season's Amazing Race. Surprise, surprise - it happens to be raining in Seattle this day. As the show opens, the 12 teams are dramatically flown to their starting point by sea plane. I guess there are no major roads that lead to Seattle. It must be so remote that the only way to get there is by sea plane. As the teams leave their sea planes, we are introduced to them one by one: Sarah and Peter - Triathalon training partners who've recently started dating. She has an artificial leg and he builds artificial limbs. I wonder if they'll be carrying a "spare" with them in their backpacks. Bilal and Sa'eed - Two American Muslims from Cleveland. "In reference to the race," Bilal declares, "there's no question we will fall over and take five minutes and pray". Rob and Kimberly - Dating couple. In the pre-interview, Rob proceeds to spill his guts about his relationship with Kimberly, "Kimberly and [my] relationship is at that point where we either move forward or we don't... Kimberly wants everything her way. But I'm a human being, she can't control me. She needs to learn that." Sheesh, Rob. This is the The Amazing Race, not Dr. Phil. At least wait until you're all stressed out from the race to vent. The rest of this article can be found on TVChicken.com/Amazing_Race

TV News: Three Dogs and a Band With No Name

Dog the Bounty Hunter Arrested Duane "Dog" Chapman, Reality TV star and bounty hunter who has become famous for catching bail-jumpers, has himself been arrested for jumping bail and failing to appear in a Mexican court. Three years ago, Dog became famous when he apprehended Max Factor heir Andrew Luster in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. However, Dog and his associates were themselves arrested shortly thereafter for failing to turn Luster over to Mexican police. It seems the Mexican authorities are under the odd impression that they should have some kind of say over what goes on in their own country. Silly Mexicans. Chapman later posted bail but failed to appear at a subsequent court hearing. So yesterday, Dog and two of his associates were arrested in Hawaii by federal marshalls. I just wish he had been caught instead by a Mexican bounty hunter named "Perro". Mr. Peabody: The Motion Picture Everyone's favorite super-smart, bespectacled, time-traveling dog (from the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show) may be headed for a theater near you at some point in the future. Dreamworks Animation is currently developing a computer-animated movie version of the cartoon. Tiffany Ward, the daughter of Jay Ward (the original show's producer), has been slated as one of the movie's executive producers. Corey Clark Fails to Appear in Court American Idol reject and Paula-Abdul's-boytoy-wannabe Corey Clark (the third "dog" in today's news) failed to appear in court Tuesday on a summons resulting from July 24 arrest for violating a court order and trespassing. As a result, an arrest warrant is expected to be issued. The July 24 arrest was the result of an incident at the home of the parents of Clark's wife. In June, a domestic violence protective order was granted Clark's wife, Monica Rodriguez Gonzalez, against Clark which prohibited him from having any contact with her, their child and seven other people. A Supernova By Any Other Name The band that chose it's lead singer on this season of the reality show Rockstar: Supernova cannot use the name "Supernova" when it goes on tour, ruled a United States District Court judge Tuesday. Another band by the same name has been performing since 1991. The ruling was actually a preliminary injuction pending the outcome of the trial. The could just use the name I have for them - "The Unwashed", or as most of America knows them, "That Guy That Married Pamela Anderson and Those Other Guys". Don't forget to check out our recap of Survivor: Cook Island's first episode here!

Episode Recap: Cook Islands, Week 1

Episode: I Can Forgive Her But I Don't Have to Because She Screwed With My Chickens Original Air Date: September 14, 2006 Do you find yourself longing wistfully for the days before De-Segregation? Does the term "separate but equal" sound like a pretty good idea to you? Do you ever wonder why people can't just go be with their own kind? Nah, me either. Yet, in an apparent effort to turn back the clock on American race relations 40 years, Mark Burnett and the other powers that be at Survivor have chosen to divide this season's batch of contestants into tribes based on their ethnicity - Black ("Hiki"), Latino ("Aitu"), Asian ("Puka"), and White ("Raro"). CBS calls this a "social experiment". Social experiment my grandmother's bunyons. This decision was made in order to create controversy, which in turn creates "buzz". And "buzz", good or bad, will almost always translate to higher initial ratings for any program. But really, the segregation isn't the worst aspect of this season's Survivor. What bothers me is this - if you're White, who the Heck are you supposed to root for? If you root for the Home Team, you appear to be racist. If you root for one of the other tribes, you appear to be either trying too hard not to appear racist, or you seem like a reverse-racist (whatever that is). Fortunately, I've decided to avoid this conundrum altogether by hating all of these losers equally right off the bat. My disdain is based on a prejudice that is rooted deep inside me - not for any particular race, but for Survivor contestants in general. I would make an exception for the contestants in Season 1 because they didn't really know what they were getting into. But anyone who had seen Season 1 would know that signing up for this show means signing one's dignity away for the off chance of maybe winning a million dollars, because there's something about being half-naked, sun-burnt, hungry, and stinky that causes people to be somewhat less than polite. By that I mean what is supposed to be a friendly contest eventually descends into Lord of the Flies. And by "eventually" I mean by the end of the first episode. Of course, there's the added charm of showing the worst side of yourself to millions of people each week. So how can I be expected to care about anyone who chooses to do this? But on to the episode. It starts out with all 20 "castaways" frantically scurrying about an old wooden ship trying to grab what supplies they can and throwing them overboard on small wooden rafts. Jeff Probst tells us the castaways have two minutes to scavenge what they can before they have to jump off the boat and row to shore. Among the supplies - chickens. That's right, live chickens. Here's another thing - apparently chickens can float. I did not know that. But we find that out as one of the castaways throws one of the poor birds overboard. It misses the raft and lands in the water, bobbing easily on the surface. Thirty seconds into the first episode and I've already learned something. As the hapless castaway jumps into the water after his chicken, Jeff yells out, "That's right! Get that chicken! You're gonna need that for food!" That Jeff, always being helpful. The rest of the post can be found here